Wednesday, February 12, 2014

One Fabulous Face


"What a fabulous face!" I said to Armand on the occasion of his one-man show at the Arts Centre. "Who was she?"

"She was my wife," Armand said ruefully. "She left me."  

"What on earth happened?"  I asked.

"She ran off with some overage insecure balding failed blog writer."

"Amazing!  How did a loser like that get such a fascinating woman?"

"She always took an interest in hopeless causes."

"What did you do about it?"   

"Nothing until this very moment, when I poisoned his sangria at my one-man show."

"But that wasn't me!"

"Oh, I know. But you're as close as I'm ever gonna get."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Well, as I breathe my last, I'm proud to say I brought in this contribution to the Friday Fictioneers based on the picture prompt above at a mere 104 words. What a fitting legacy for me, who has been known to exceed the FF limit of 100 words by as much as a couple dozen tweets and the length of Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad!  

Everything's going dark now ... except for the contributions of the other Fictioneers, which you can access by clicking hereGoodbye cruel virtual world! There's only one thing more left to say.

Good thing I don't like sangria. 

55 comments:

victoriakgallagher said...

Good Humour! I like it :)

Perry Block said...

Sounds like ice cream. I like that! Thanks.

helenahannbasquiat said...

Hey, you gotta take what you can get, darling. (Oh dear god, I set myself up for whatever comes next, and here, my backspace key is broken again. Shit.)

Perry Block said...

When it comes to you, darling, I'm most interested in my "enter" key!

Björn said...

Ha.. it wasn't me.. not yet balding

Perry Block said...

Too bad. Armand thought you were, and there's a list..

Russell said...

Live hard, die young, and leave a good looking corpse. I might have qualified for the first one, Perry, but you're too old to die young and I'm not even going to comment on the condition of your corpse. I hear bald is very popular in the next life.

Perry Block said...

Yeah, that means Telly Savalas is going to be nailing all the chicks that I go after up there. For once I'm not bald enough, and it's for eternity!

Silently Heard said...

Oh how mean! But quite funny.

mezzojan said...

Hey, if you gotta go, drinking wine is the second best way to go, and you probably don't have a shot at the very best way, so....

Perry Block said...

I'm dead and you're finding it funny!

Yeah, I hope it is. My business hasn't exactly been booming lately.

Perry Block said...

Don't have a shot at the very best way? As I said, call me when the boob job is done, and we'll give it a shot!

theeclecticeccentricshopaholic said...

LOL I'm sorry, Perry, I know you almost died but I just can't stop laughing :)

Perry Block said...

That's okay. You're evil. Everybody knows it.

Rajlakshmi said...

Loved the twist at the end. :D

Perry Block said...

Thank you. I always love a twist at the end where I'm dead too!

Sandra Crook said...

We've only your word for it that it wasn't you... :)

Perry Block said...

Do I look like a hopeless cause to you?

lizy-expat-writer said...

No wonder she left him.

paulestaruthsusan said...

Good good story with a great funny ending. Your comments following it were as funny as the story.

Lewis Cave said...

Interesting version of revenge, not sure it would be effective though. Great story!

Reading Pleasure said...

So funny!

Deanna said...

You're so funny! I also loved your bit at the end after the story.

Atreyee said...

Well,at least you got to drink the sangria ;-)lol!Again,a great job Perry :-)

Dawn Q. said...

Poor, poor Perry; always taking the fall! You clever, funny man. ;-)

Patrick Prinsloo said...

A strange revenge. But if that does the trick, why not?

wmqcolby said...

Now, Perry, what did Russell ever do to you anyway?

bridgesareforburning said...

Hi Perry,
Poisoned wine seems to be the theme of the day. Wow, could have had a V8. Ron

Perry Block said...

But couldn't she have left him for a cool guy?

Perry Block said...

Thank you. And I wrote those comments with the Grim Reaper going "C'mon already, c'mon already!"

Perry Block said...

Well, it certainly would serve to deter the original offender. Me, I'm walking the straight and narrow.

Perry Block said...

When someone named Reading Pleasure gives you a "so funny!" how can you lose?

Perry Block said...

Another so funny! I'm well on my way to "too funny!"

Perry Block said...

Thank you, but I'll pass on the sangria.

Perry Block said...

No, you're taking the fall! I won't play the sap for you, not you or anybody else! I won't walk in Thursby's shoes and the .... oh,sorry, I got carried away there. Yeah, you're right, I'm talking the fall.

Perry Block said...

Well, if it does the trick, happy to oblige!

Perry Block said...

I thought it might be Russell too at first but his hair's too good. And as much as I like the guy, I'm not pulling a Sydney Carton for him, no way, no how!

Perry Block said...

You're right about the poisoned wine. Based on this week's stories, there should be about 13 Friday Fictioneers left to come back next week.

pattisjarrett said...

If all the Friday Fictioneers get killed off, I may get a shot at being in the top ten for a change! Sorry to hear of your demise.

Rochelle Wisoff-Fields said...

Dear Perry,

Keep in mind, one of the hottest guys around is Patrick Stewart. He put the B-eautiful in B-ald. IMHO. I'm swearing off wine this week. ;)

Shalom,

Rochelle

Perry Block said...

Yes, but I'll haunt you!

Perry Block said...

True, but it doesn't hurt to have two iconic roles to your credit as well. Besides this post isn't about bald, it's about that Fabulous Face!

nanclairefalkner said...

Gosh, you are so clever and good story! Thanks - too bad he didn't care that he got the wrong man. Close only counts in Horseshoes! Thanks, Nan

Perry Block said...

Thanks for the compliment. At my age, any comment about horseshoes is kind of scary, but I appreciate the kind words.

lingeringvisions said...

Damn all those "other" overage insecure balding failed blog writing wife stealers!

Perry Block said...

And the worst thing is they won't even let me into the club because I'm not bald enough!

Coach Factory said...

abercrombie and fitch, longchamp, nike free, nike air max, barbour, hollister, lacoste, louboutin, north face, air force, sac louis vuitton, nike roshe, ray ban pas cher, nike trainers, louis vuitton, hollister, longchamp, nike huarache, ralph lauren, air jordan, tn pas cher, sac guess, vanessa bruno, burberry, timberland, hermes, michael kors, lululemon, nike roshe run, converse pas cher, ralph lauren, nike free, michael kors, vans shoes, new balance pas cher, hollister, louis vuitton, mulberry, vans, longchamp, nike blazer, ray ban, louis vuitton, montre pas cher, hogan, karen millen, air max, air max, michael kors, oakley pas cher

Coach Factory said...

abercrombie and fitch, mac cosmetics, valentino shoes, moncler outlet, insanity, canada goose, canada goose, herve leger, canada goose outlet, juicy couture outlet, ferragamo shoes, new balance shoes, asics, instyler, ugg boots, rolex watches, giuseppe zanotti, beats by dre, ghd, babyliss pro, birkin bag, jimmy choo, moncler, uggs on sale, chi flat iron, ugg, wedding dresses, canada goose, mcm handbags, canada goose, north face outlet, celine handbags, roshe run, reebok outlet, mont blanc, soccer shoes, juicy couture outlet, moncler, nfl jerseys, canada goose outlet, soccer jerseys, moncler, uggs outlet, lululemon outlet, marc jacobs, supra shoes, p90x, ugg boots, north face jackets, bottega veneta

Coach Factory said...

coach outlet, longchamp handbags, louis vuitton outlet, toms shoes, prada outlet, michael kors outlet, longchamp outlet, gucci outlet, ray ban sunglasses, nike free, christian louboutin shoes, cheap oakley sunglasses, prada handbags, michael kors outlet online, coach factory outlet, polo ralph lauren outlet, polo ralph lauren outlet online, michael kors outlet online, true religion jeans, ray ban sunglasses, coach outlet, nike air max, louboutin shoes, louboutin, michael kors outlet, burberry outlet online, coach purses, tiffany and co, burberry outlet online, louis vuitton handbags, chanel handbags, tory burch outlet, michael kors outlet, jordan shoes, air max, longchamp handbags, kate spade handbags, louis vuitton, michael kors outlet, coach outlet store online, louboutin outlet, nike shoes, kate spade outlet, louis vuitton outlet online, oakley sunglasses, oakley sunglasses, louis vuitton outlet stores

chenlili said...

chenlili20160613
oakley sunglasses
hollister
kobe 10
ray ban sunglasses outlet
louis vuitton handbags
giuseppe zanotti
michael kors outlet clearance
nike trainers women
ray ban sunglasses
cheap air jordans
ray ban sunglasses
polo ralph lauren
hollister jeans
coach factory outlet
oakley outlet
ralph lauren polo
louboutin
vans shoes
cheap louis vuitton handbags
ray ban sunglasses
ray ban sunglasses discount
rolex watches
air jordan 4
louis vuitton
beats by dr dre
michael kors outlet online
michael kors handbags
basketball shoes
adidas factory outlet
kate spade outlet
michael kors purses
christian louboutin shoes
michael kors outlet clearance
coach outlet store online clearances
coach factory outlet
michael kors handbags
coach factory outlet

Unknown said...

fitflops sale
michael kors outlet store
cheap nike shoes
michael kors outlet
kobe bryant shoes
giuseppe zanotti outlet
coach outlet clearance
longchamp outlet
longchamp handbag
oakley sunglasses
chanyuan0920

千禧 Xu said...

polo ralph lauren outlet
ralph lauren outlet online
cheap basketball shoes
mlb jerseys
mont blanc pens outlet
moncler jackets
jordan shoes
ed hardy
kobe 9
adidas nmd

Gege Dai said...

michael kors outlet clearance
soccer jerseys
air max 90
louis vuitton outlet
cheap ray bans
ecco outlet
louis vuitton outlet
juicy couture outlet
ray ban sunglasses
ralph lauren polo
20170323lck

Gege Dai said...

nike outlet store online
coach factory outlet
coach outlet online
converse shoes sale
adidas wings shoes
cheap oakley sunglasses
polo pas cher
michael kors outlet online
michael kors outlet online
puma shoes
20170511lck

obat penggugur kandungan said...

This blog is so nice to me. I will continue to come here again and again. Visit my link as well. Good luck
http://www.jualobataborsiherbal.com/ obat aborsi
http://caramenggugurkankandungan.info/ cara menggugurkan kandungan
http://www.jualobataborsiherbal.com/cara-menggugurkan-kandungan/ cara menggugurkan kandungan
http://tandatandakehamilan.net/ tanda tanda kehamilan
http://tandatandakehamilan.net/cara-cepat-dan-selamat-menggugurkan-kandungan/ cara menggugurkan kandungan
http://obataborsi59.com/ obat aborsi
http://obataborsi59.com/cara-menggugurkan-kandungan-dengan-cepat-dan-aman/ cara menggugurkan kandungan
http://obattelatdatangbulan.info/ obat telat datang bulan
http://klinikobataborsi.com/ jual obat aborsi