Saturday, August 30, 2014

This Time I'm Afraid It's Different


copyright Madison Woods

"Jesus Christ, Perry, don't you ever brush!"

"Sure I do, Dr. Howard.  Regularly.  Three times a day, every Thursday."

"I thought so!  And what kind of toothpaste are you using?"

"A very good one.  Crest with Chocolate Morsels."

"I thought so!  "That is not an effective decay-preventive dentifrice!"

"What are you saying, Dr. Howard?  We've got more of the old drill and fill ahead?"

"No, Perry, this time I'm afraid it's different."

"What is it?"

"Drill, fill, then run for our lives!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Frankly I wasn't aware there was even a prompt this week since I saw nothing online proffered by Rochelle, whom I set my Friday Fictioneers clock by --- as well as my barometer and Cuisinart --- but then I saw the Hollywood Squares Authors Block (as Russell calls it) taking shape before my quizzical eyes with a prompt originally provided by Madison Woods, whose pen name I would love to have taken for my own had she not slipped in and grabbed it first. 

So here's my hastily composed response to this week's elusive prompt made this Saturday, August 30, 2014. You can find the other far savvier and tuned in Fictioneers' offerings by clicking right here. 

Oh, one more thing.  That prompt above?  Gag me with a spoon!

22 comments:

Alicia said...

Having worked at a dental office I can relate to this sad tale of "once a week" brushing. Sad to say, some people NEVER brush and can't wait to get dentures. Yikes! Well done.

Perry Block said...

I'm nothing like that for real! In fact I'm thinking of upping my brushing to three or four days a week. Love that Crest with Chocolate Morsels!

Anonymous said...

Yikes! My mouth hurts. I could see how you would see dental decay with this one. I think kids might actually brush with toothpaste if it had chocolate morsels. The bubble gum flavor is not fooling them! Funny stuff, Perry.

Perry Block said...

Somehow that's all I could see, but then again I brush weekly (and weakly). But you know, Amy, chocolate morsels for kids isn't a bad idea, as long as we wash it down with Listerine Coke right afterwards!

Anonymous said...

Bleagh! Definitely needs a new brushing regimen! o.O

Anonymous said...

Dear Perry, Yuck - if that is what happens if you don't brush - then I'm glad I brush. You have a funny dentist and 'Listerine Coke' just sounds WRONG! I'm drinking one right now. You are hilarious Perry! Are there really people who never brush their teeth? How do they stand to go to bed with gunk all over their teeth - you know me - I've now had 11 root canals and it's not from brushing - I got my bad from genes. My twin sister, Ann and I both have bad teeth - but we still have them. Oh well - I'm running on again - have a good week Perry! Nan :)

P.S. Joshi said...

Perry, I think something ate my first comment. Here's a second one. That photo prompt seems even more disgusting now that it's supposed to be tooth tartar. Hilarious story as usual. : ) ---Susan

Randy Mazie said...

.... and that is how the Aliens devoured the Earth.

Now little Perry Jr. Remember to brush your teeth every day unless you want to grow up like your father and destroy the world with your bad breath and horrible teeth.

Fun stuff, Perry.

Randy

Perry Block said...

Even with a whole regiment brushing my teeth probably couldn't very much improve my dental care ...

Perry Block said...

You too, Nan. I'm surprised you have time to brush from the detailed comments you're always writing. Have a Listerine Coke and chill out! And have a good holiday ....

Perry Block said...

Thanks, Susan. I've been brushing even since I wrote it.

Perry Block said...

My alien are coming for you NOW, Randy!

Anonymous said...

Dentists and hygienists do not make enough money.

Subroto said...

I hear Tooth Fairies are negotiating a pay rise after reading this.

Perry Block said...

Those that are still living, yes I agree.

Sun said...

oh, poor dears...both the dentist and the patient! your hastily composed story takes a good bite at flash fiction. or... is it fiction???

Perry Block said...

While the hastily composed story is based on actual facts, thank god some of the events depicted herein are fictional! Of course my dentist is in Borneo right now and refuses to come back!

Perry Block said...

Most tooth fairies are actually middle aged men who surreptitiously leave money under their kids' pillows and hope not to get caught. Very few of them have wings. They probably deserve a pay raise more than anyone.

Russell said...

As you probably know, Perry. We invented the toothbrush in Arkansas. Otherwise it would have been called a teethbrush.

Perry Block said...

I love that! Thanks, Russell

Anonymous said...

Reminds me of one of my favorite Steven Wright jokes:

"My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments.”

Perry Block said...

I'd try it but my dental hygienist is 350 pounds and looks like Steven Wright.