Thursday, July 2, 2015

Highway to Heck! (FF)

© Jean L. Hays

"And so the Road Warrior drove the tanker out of the compound at breakneck speed, chased furiously by the vicious marauders that had held the people in the compound captive."

"Wow!  And this enabled the people in the compound to escape with the necessary oil to rebuild civilization?”

"Right! And the Road Warrior was able to deftly maneuver many of the marauders' vehicles into fiery collisions so that the landscape was ultimately strewn with their devastated wreckage!"

"I see. And these are some of those destroyed vehicles!"

"Of course not. I'm just telling you about a movie. It didn't happen.”

"So what are these cars?"

"Oh, parallel parking practice for Perry Block.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Just a little basic self-deprecation for this week's Friday Fictioneers and I'm off. 


It's true I'm lousy at parallel parking. Once I parked so far from the curb I needed a GPS to get to the meter.  You'll need no GPS to get to the stories by the other Friday Fictioneers, however, as you can read their takes on the above picture prompt simply by clicking here.

Okay, I'm off on my Highway to Heck.  Have a good holiday!

30 comments:

Russell said...

I thought you were attempting to jump a cigarette butt and took a nosedive. Remember that old country song that said, "Give me forty acres and I'll turn this rig around." That pretty much details my driving skills. Maybe we can be the next Thelma & Louise, or Crusty Old Curmudgeons.

Sandra Crook said...

I'll drive myself, I think, Perry, but thanks for the offer. :)

Keith's Ramblings said...

Some people just can't do it. Thank goodness for these new self-parking cars!
Visit Keith's Ramblings!

Anonymous said...

It's an impressive innovation Perry. Just think how many more cars we can fit in, if we park them vertically.

Anonymous said...

Nice. I understand you got your license now. Congrats. Randy

Rochelle Wisoff-Fields said...

Dear Perry,

I park miles from a destination if the only close spots involve parallel parking. I've had some embarrassing moments in my attempts. Not happening in this lifetime. Love the title.

Shalom,

Rochelle

Perry Block said...

I'm just not a skilled driver is all. Several times a successful trip back home for me from work was covered by the local Action News. And you be Gena Davis, I'll be Susan Sarandon, I'll have a longer career. No crusty for us!

Perry Block said...

Oh, but Sandra, it's just the parking that's bad. All you have to do is dig out of a little sand.

Perry Block said...

Yeah Keith! Buy me one.

Perry Block said...

That was my innovation I'm not getting credit for!

Perry Block said...

I sure do. Does it matter that it's purple with a picture of Donald Trump on it?

liz young said...

Heehee! It seems you're no better at parallel parking than my old man!

Perry Block said...

Me too, and I need embarrassment in this lifetime like I need to be hired as Donald Trump's image consultant. Thanks, Rochelle!

Perry Block said...

How old is your old man? If he's over 114, I'll bet I am slightly better!

Anonymous said...

How could I resist reading your submission after seeing the wonderful title? Parallel parking at its worst. (I cna't get my name and URL and ....well, anyway) Alicia

Perry Block said...

Thanks, Alicia. OMG, watch out!!!!!

Anonymous said...

I find my parallel parking skills ebb and flow; the other day a cop car was waiting for me to get off the road and I swear if I'd taken one more attempt he'd have arrested me for causing a public nuisance. Loved the story, as usual.

plaridel said...

i think you're a candidate for a self-parking car. ford sells it for a good price. :)

Perry Block said...

Thank you. Now pull over!

Perry Block said...

I heard it works well but makes a few too many snarky comments about how well it parks and you don't. When they refine it to be nicer, maybe I'll buy one.

Anonymous said...

I can't parallel park either, Perry. Well, sometimes I can if I get lucky. The movies are like one big car chase with a lot of unhealthy looking people. :) They really should clean up after their car wrecks!

Perry Block said...

Yes, you and me parallel parking would probably produce one really good car chase/ car wreck movie. I'm sure we'd collide!

P.S. Joshi said...

I used to be able to parallel park, but I'm really out of practice. When I was learning, the high school instructor put two sticks to imitate cars. I did just fine until I made the mistake of taking my foot off the brake. When I pulled out, I ran right over the front stick. Good thing it had a spring and wasn't a car. Good story, Perry. Funny as heck like the highway. :D

Dawn said...

It's so funny: I just had someone trying to explain the new Mad Max to me, and it sounded an awful lot like this! ;-) Funny and entertaining, Perry; nice story! I pride myself on being a great parallel parker; I grew up in Boston, where it's a life skill!

Gah Learner said...

Hehehe, too funny. I can parallel park when I have enough practice. But I prefer not to...

margirene said...

I learned to drive in a VW beetle, and my wonderful instructor taught me exactly how to reverse park by lining up points on the car to points outside, visually. I could do it perfectly. But when I got a different car ....... well that's another story. Your story is very funny. I loved it.

Perry Block said...

Thanks, Suzanne, but I'm trying to concentrate right now on parallel parking and ... OMG ... I ran over the stick! I mean, the car! Driven by a big, angry guy.

Perry Block said...

Well, I spent a lot of time in Boston and fortunately I didn't have a car because I would never have gotten out of it endlessly circling Kenmore Square.

Perry Block said...

I try to avoid it by parking in lots and/or staying home. It's a boring life but at least I don't have to parallel park.

Perry Block said...

Thank you. Tell you what? Line up the points on your current car & you can drive me around anytime!