Wednesday, July 15, 2015

The Attack (FF)


"It's been a wonderful time here exploring this strange but beautiful land," said Sporka, sipping the last vestiges of a cup of tea as he sat in the courtyard cafe.

"I've loved it too," replied Manus. "But our mission is now over, and soon the Attack will begin."

"Is there no way to stop it, Manus?  I don't want an Attack!" 

"I’ve tried to find a way, Sporka, but it is as if decreed. The Attack will happen!"

"And as always," muttered Sporka, "there will be untold pain and suffering.” 

Manus paid the café bill and Sporka and Manus beamed up to their hotel room, Sporka beaming right into the bathroom.

"OOOHHH!” he moaned.  “Always whenever I travel to Earth!" 

“The Attack has begun," sighed Manus.

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This one is so cheap and exploitative even I feel like hiding in the bathroom. Nevertheless this is my crude and tasteless response to this week's lovely picture prompt above from ace Friday Fictioneer Sandra Crook.

You won't be moaning and groaning like Sporka if you check out the work of the other Fictioneers by clicking here; in fact, you'll be oohing and aahing!

And now, if you'll pardon me, I'm off to signal my masters on Pluto to begin the Attack.
  

29 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Thank you. And I'm not even really sick!

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  2. LOL. "Manus" ? ..Seems like a good nickname for some men I know.

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  3. "Of all the Greasy Spoons in all the towns in all the world, Sporka walks into mine."
    - Rack (ed with) Paine, from the film Gastroblancya

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    1. Yep, Sporka thinks our food is interplanetary fast food; it's "McEarthling!"

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  4. Very funny! With the name Sporka, nothing good can come of the meal ;-)

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    1. I like that name too. I have no idea where it came from, except now it's my new middle name!

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  5. An entertaining little piece, but it is a shame we must burn...
    I am with Sporka (great name!) on this one, the toilet here I come!

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    1. Meet ya in there. That'll be three of us, and Sporka has dibs!

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    1. What, you're sorry it wasn't a real attack?

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  7. Now if they'd visited Mexico I could have understood that... the French would be horrified.

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    1. Sporka can't stand cheese, just like me and Fluffster from the last story.

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  8. Dear Perry,

    If they're seasoned travelers they should know better than to drink the water.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

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    1. And to breath the air. And speaking of seasoned, eat the seasonings too. And eat the damn cheese!

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  9. Attack of the germs, very funny. Poor Aliens, they should do something with their immune system.

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    1. Maybe they ought to just skip Earth altogether, cool rooves notwithstanding.

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  10. Ha! Somehow I knew what the Attack was - you finished it off nicely. Alicia (Dang, the site isn't take my name and URL - sometimes it does sometimes not.)

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    1. I think Sporka telegraphed it. Certainly not me. Yeah I don't know what the deal is with Blogger, but it doesn't like me either!

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  11. Rochelle beat me to the line! They should know better! Very funny!

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  12. I guess they had one of those all night suppers that start at midnight. I'm still laughing. The name Sporka alone does me in. Maybe too much dijon.

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  13. I guess not everyone enjoyed the cuisine. Rich food will do that, funny!

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  14. Love it! My OH has had an Attack this week, but his is due to warm beer, not tea!

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  15. No wonder Sporka's reluctant. Is this their secret weapon? Death by diarrhoea? Will anyone survive? Funny.

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  16. Don't they know you shouldn't drink the tea when visiting alien planets? ;-) Fun stuff as usual.

    Cheers!
    MG

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  17. Note really flush with success then? Toilet humour works every time indeed.

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  18. Well Perry I look at it this way, if they intend to attack our planet, they deserve what they get. Hilarious and well done again. :D --- Suzanne

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