Wednesday, June 15, 2016

The Bearded Lady is Next (FF)

FF-Friday Fictioneers
Copyright - John Nixon

Times had been rough for the Spangling Brothers- Farnum & O’Reilly Circus. 

With the loss of its elephant act and the ability of folks in even the farthest reaches to view spectacles of all sorts via TV and internet, the need to cut costs became paramount.

“Oh, Scruffles,” called out Russell Gayer, wily manager of the circus, to his number 1 clown, “I have lost a contact lens in the piano. Would you go get it please?"

As Scruffles climbed into the piano, Gayer laid off his first employee.

“One down,” he cackled.  “The Bearded Lady is next.”

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What a bastard!  What kind of person chooses to lay out .... I mean lay off an employee like this?  Then again it ain't too shabby to save on severance, unemployment, and extended benefits when you're laying off an employee and you've got to keep costs low.

So we'll give Russell the benefit of the doubt.  If you click here, you can give Russell and all the other Friday Fictioneers the benefit of the doubt too with respect to their takes on the picture prompt above.

Just keep away from the piano.

24 comments:

  1. And who's that coming out of the Men's room? What a surprise, it's the bearded lady. Been sitting down on the job again?
    What's that? You've been writing a blog?

    Who in the world would want to read that? Oh, so the editor at Humor Outcasts wants you to write "10 Reasons Bearded Women Have More Fun." I hope that story has nothing to do with goats.

    I think I'll run away from the circus and take up golf.

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    1. "Ten Reasons Bearded Women Have More Fun" has already been written and it has nothing to do with goats but rather with the prodigious equipment one very old goat possesses. Who? It can't be me of course because I'm Jewish, so it must be another old goat. Run away from the circus? The bearded ones will never let you leave, Casanova!

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  2. Truth is stranger than fiction!

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    Replies
    1. You're right. And this story is completely true except I've made Russell a lot nicer.

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    2. And I appreciate it too. When I'm elected president, you can be my chief of staff.

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  3. Clever piece here, Perry, and I never did trust that Russell guy.
    But you might tell him that, according to my exhaustive research, there are 11 Reasons Bearded Women Have More Fun.

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    1. Never trust that Russell guy, that's the takeaway. You can't imagine how many bearded children he's left behind in his wake.

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  4. I think you can sent the bearded lady to the ladies room with a trigger-happy guard outside.

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    1. Don't give nefarious Russell any more ideas!

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  5. Replies
    1. That's the only excuse for dressing like that!

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  6. That Russell can be heartless! But at least he allows(allowed) the bearded lady to use the restroom that matches her gender identity :-)

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    Replies
    1. Yeah, but if I know that Russell, he was peeking!

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    2. Peeking? I got it on video.

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  7. What on earth would you do without Russell, Perry, or he without you. Russell better watch out for the bearded lady. She's been working out for a weight-lifting competition. Funny story, Perry. :D --- Suzanne

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    1. What on earth would I do without Russell? He stole the Bearded Lady from me! (Actually I've been meaning to thank him.)

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  8. He shoudn't be too sure about the Bearded Lady, she may not be as gullible as Scruffles.

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    Replies
    1. I doubt she will be, especially with Scruffles feet hanging out the front of it.

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  9. When things get tough you have to halve your payroll, I guess.

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    Replies
    1. Halve your clowns too. At the waist.

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  10. He probably learned this from the magicians! lol

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    Replies
    1. Yep! They make the employees disappear.

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