Wednesday, February 5, 2014

Blue Lamps, Red Lamps, Pink Lamps


"Blue lamps, red lamps, pink lamps ... why do you have so many lamps, Perry?"

"This is nothing.  You should see what I've got in the attic, basement, and storage shed in the back!"

"But why? You could light up half of Las Vegas with that many lamps!" 

"Actually I've figured it to be about three-quarters."

"What's the point?"

"Ever since I was a child, I've loved the Arabian Nights. I've always dreamt I would one day find the magical Genie of the Lamp and get my three wishes!"

"But that's a different kind of lamp!" 

"Really? No wonder all the genies I've found only gave me two."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yes, if you've rubbed as many lamps as I have over the years, you've either gotten a genie or a number of severe electrical shocks, one or the other. 

Either way, this week you've also gotten a very respectable and mere 105 words --- close to the magical mark of 100 words --- in my Friday Fictioneers offering in response to the picture prompt above. 

If you rub your mouse right here, the other Friday Fictioneers will appear and grant all your fondest wishes. Well, some of them anyways.

Yeah, the clean ones.
  

53 comments:

glynis rankin said...

I enjoyed this, it so made me giggle! Thanks for the laugh!

Silently Heard said...

Loved the twist. Only two wishes. Better than none. :-)

Perry Block said...

Thank you. Everyone who comments gets a wish. And yours is ...?

Perry Block said...

Yes, Kimberly, but I did hope I could use the third wish to send you $10,000,000, but no such luck.

janet said...

That's truly a shocking story, Perry!

janet

Anonymous said...

A good one there!
- Anjana.

Perry Block said...

I thought it was illuminating!

Perry Block said...

Where? Where? Oh, here?
Thanks!

Sandra Crook said...

Nice one Perry! :)

Perry Block said...

Thanks, Sandra. Got a couple of leftover wishes here for you!

Anonymous said...

I suppose he should be grateful he got any wishes at all. Nice story

Deanna Herrmann said...

Very cute, I especially loved the Vegas reference since I'm from there. :-)

Rochelle Wisoff-Fields said...

Ohm my goodness, Perry. Watt a fun story. Why would he only get two wishes from an electric lamp genie? I'd think he'd have more power and give 4 or 5. Just sayin'.

Shalom,

Rochelle

Anonymous said...

Hi Perry,
Rubbing your lamp again are you? Is that code? Or did you used to stick your finger in the socket when you were a boy and still get a charge out of doing that? Don't go into the light! Ron

tedstrutz said...

I never read other people's comments, but just caught Rochelle's out of the corner of my eye. Oh dear Lord! I think you and Russell are ruining her. Cute story.

Anonymous said...

or maybe you just rubbed them the wrong way :-) hilarious story. and be careful in dealing with genies, they have a way of twisting your words and wishes :-)

Perry Block said...

He's grateful he got any lamps.

Perry Block said...

I knew that. Hey, can you get us any free passes to the Bellagio?

Perry Block said...

Electric Lamp genies are mostly unionied. Try getting two wishes out of them without paying overtime, let alone three or more ...

Perry Block said...

It's code in that my first wish for any genie I ever found was that I wouldn't have to rub any lamps any more. I'm still rubbing them. You do the math.

Perry Block said...

It's Russell. Thank you!

Perry Block said...

Coming from a true twisted one, I'll take that advice to heart!

Anonymous said...

Very funny story. You have to be careful. Those genies have had a lot of time to think and can be tricky. Also, they build up anger sitting in there and I wouldn't want to be the one to release one of them.

Anonymous said...

Very humorous story. You have to be careful of genies. They're clever and build up anger sitting in those lamps. I wouldn't want to release one.

Libby said...

I can always look to your blog for a smile or a laugh. Thanks Perry!

N/A said...

I call bullshit. My wish was not granted.

I always loved lamps too. I know a few people who say if they ever won the lotto they would build a room in their home full of just lamps. That might be going too far, but I think it shows how people just like pretty light.

brudberg said...

And if every Genie gave you 2 new lamps... that's a lot of lamps.... great one.

Perry Block said...

I think there was an Arabian Nights story like that where the genie said the wish he would grant the person who found the lamp was the way he wanted to die. I think the guy wished for "by old age." Then again, I may be mixing that up with any one of the dozens of genies I've found.

Bodhirose said...

Haha...you're a funny guy...cute story!

Perry Block said...

You and Anonymous were either separated at birth or are the same person. Or is one of my genies playing tricks on me?

Perry Block said...

Thanks, Libby! Frankly you're about the only one who looks to my blog altogether.

Perry Block said...

I can grant your wish, Jean Marie.

All right, it's more of my wish, but it's a wish nonetheless.

Perry Block said...

Wait a minute... I've just gotten the lamp with Barbara Eden! Barbara Eden at the age she is now, that is ...

Perry Block said...

Thank you, but I would prefer to be a cute guy with a funny story.

Anonymous said...

This is certainly a magical tale, Perry. I've never any wishes. Where do you get these lamps, hmm?

Perry Block said...

If I actually knew, think I'd be sitting here on the internet begging for comments from the Friday Fictioneers or off on the Via Veneto sipping champagne with Scarlett Johansson and counting my polo ponies? Sorry to burst any illusions ...

Anonymous said...

Hey Perry - good story and funny - Wouldn't that be great? Funny.

Perry Block said...

Wouldn't it be great? Who says it isn't real? I just now wished that you'd comment!

Anonymous said...

I always love your punchlines, Perry! Very nice.
Dawn/Tales From the Motherland

Anonymous said...

An eternal optimist! Nice story. I like a hero who doesn't give up until he gets his 3 wishes.

Shirley said...

Another great story. I always love reading yours. So cute.

Perry Block said...

Thank you. If it isn't three, throw 'em back!

Perry Block said...

Well, you can only get warmed up with the first two. Thanks!

Perry Block said...

Thanks, and welcome back!

Anonymous said...

Haha! Well at least you found a number of Genies! One of those wishes must have been for more genies!

Perry Block said...

Thanks, Linda! Believe it or not, Pattisj (No. 69) had a very ingenious solution to the running out of wishes problem along the same lines as your comment. Check it out..

Anonymous said...

Hey I would gladly take two wishes!

Perry Block said...

OMG, of course I would as well. No 1: I'm rich. No 2: I'm in the record books. That's all you need!

Russell said...

Hey, I resemble that remark!

Russell said...

You know what they say, Perry, wish in one hand and crap in the other and see which one makes the best candidate for a Charmin commercial.

Perry Block said...

That remark is just a little bit cuter than you. Not by much.

Perry Block said...

I wonder who remembers those old Charmin commercials. Also, how did you know I crap in one hand?

Anonymous said...

Loved the twist at the end!