News on the Radio

Goodnight and Good luck .... and you'll need it!

I'm really proud of my son Brandon.  He and a friend have recently begun a once-a-week  program on their high school radio station discussing national and international news and current events.

Naturally to get the program up and running, he turned to his dad for advice. As Brandon realizes, I am an experienced blogger for whom a life-long interest in history and world affairs has been, well, something of a major passion!    

 "Hey, Brandon," I said. "Wait up!  Hey, wait up!"

"What is it, Dad?"

"It's your first show today. Don't you have any questions or stuff you want to ask me about?"

"Not really, Dad.  We're good to go. We're leading off with the latest on the Syrian uprising."

"Well, that's very good, of course," I replied,  proud of Brandon's knowledge of what's going on in the vitally important but troubled region of the Middle East.  

I'm pretty sure that's where Syria is. 

"But you want to make sure you've got the domestic issues covered too," I said. "Like Occupy Wall Street."

"Sure, Dad, we're doing that," said Brandon.  "We've got some pretty good analysis on both sides of the issue, including the need for the protesters to speak with a more precise unified voice and for conservatives to try to understand the frustrations that have sparked the protests."

"Oh .... sure .... yeah ....  good.  Y'know, Bran, did I ever tell you about that peace march back in the early 70's when ...." 

"You were following that girl you thought might be Peggy Lipton from The Mod Squad all the way from the Washington Monument to the Lincoln Memorial and you hooked up with that stoned guy who kept getting Coretta Scott King confused with actress  Loretta Young?" 

"Right, that's the one!"

"Half dozen times or so."

"Now that was truly a ...."

"Dad,  we've got it all covered.  We're also going to be talking  about the debt crisis in Italy and strategies the new prime minister there might implement to handle it."

"The new prime minister?!!  What happened to the old guy with the hookers?!!!"

"They threw him out.  The new prime minister is an economist who may be better prepared to tackle the nation's problems.  Oh, gee, look at the time!"

"Okay, well then  ....  have a good show, Bran! And don't worry about brain farts, it can happen to anybody!"

"Brain farts? Like with Herman Cain and Rick Perry?  Why would I have a brain fart?"

"Well, let's say someone asks you about ... uhhh ... the Iranian nuclear thingie ...  umm ....  or the .... uhhh ... super committee which is ... I think ... if it should be exposed to kryptonite like Superman, it  might ... umm ...."

"Dad, why don't you just listen to the program today?" said Brandon.  

"Okay." 

"And if you like, when I get back, we can discuss any questions you have!"  

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Brain Fart!

Ooops!

In a week of truly terrible news,  Governor Rick Perry's brain fart at the Republican Presidential hopefuls' debate last Wednesday night served as a sort of comic relief for the nation. 

So comic in fact that Governor Perry went and did a Letterman Top Ten List on Thursday night in an attempt at damage control for stammering, stumbling, and appearing like a total idiot in front of the national television audience when called upon to state what he supposedly believes in with all his heart and soul.

Brain freeze?  Yes, you or I (especially you!)  could easily forget our own names if called upon to debate governmental policy in front of millions.  But we don't want to be President of the United States!

You do?  Shut up, you're ruining this bit!

What happens when President Perry has a brain fart when his finger is on the button and he forgets what country he's supposed to destroy?  Hopefully he'll have had an earlier brain fart and the only button he'll have his finger on will be on his belly!

Just imagine the impact a badly timed brain fart might have had on great historical events:


Friend, Romans, and Countrymen,  lend me your .... umm ..... uhhh .... lawnmower!  .... no, that's not it .... buck fifty for a cup of coffee .... no, that's not right .... seersucker sports coat, I've got a hot date on Friday! ...... nah, not it .... ooops! 

 Mark Antony,  Julius Caesar, Act III, Scene II 

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I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me liberty or give me. ... umm .... uhhhh .... a set of Samsonite luggage!  .... no, that's not it ....  a new car!  Yes, Patrick, you'll be the talk of the town behind the wheel of  .... no, that's not right .... sorry, Patrick, but we have some fine parting gifts ..... nah, not it .... ooops!

Patrick Henry, Virginia Convention, March 23, 1775

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Fourscore and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent a new nation, conceived in liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that .... umm .... uhhhh .... girls just wanna have fun, they just wanna, they just wanna! .... no, that's not it ....  I'm lovin it! .... no, that's not right .... why don't we do it in the road? .... nah, not it .... ooops! 

Abraham Lincoln,  The Gettysburg Address, November 19, 1863

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Brain farts, so you see,  can be kind of risky if you aspire to greatness.

Politicians should best stick to the other type of fart.  

Frankly, with what's coming out of Washington,  we're all used to the smell.

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