Sunday, September 26, 2010

A Short History of Humanity


We have shoving each other, why do we need grunting?

We have grunting, why do we need short bursts of grunting?

We have short bursts of grunting, why do we need small words?

We have small words, why do we need big words?

We have big words, we do we need big and small words together?

We have big and small words together, why do we need many big and small words together?

We have many big and small words together, why do we need talking?

We have talking, why do we need a man talking to one man and then running to other places and talking to another man?

We have a man talking to one man and then running to other places and talking to another man, why do we need a man carrying talking inscribed on dried clay tablets riding in an oxcart to other places to give talking inscribed on dried clay tablets to another man?

We have a man carrying talking inscribed on dried clay tablets riding in an oxcart to other places to give talking inscribed on dried clay tablets to another man, why do we need a man carrying papyrus scrolls riding in a chariot to other places to present papyrus scrolls to another man?

We have a man carrying papyrus scrolls riding in a chariot to other places to present papyrus scrolls to another man, why do we need a man carrying official communiqués of the realm and correspondence to and from the educated elite riding in a carriage drawn by a team of horses to other places to provide official communiqués of the realm and correspondence to and from the educated elite to another man?

We have a man carrying official communiqués of the realm and correspondence to and from the educated elite riding in a carriage drawn by a team of horses to other places to provide official communiqués of the realm and correspondence to and from the educated elite to another man, why do we need a man or woman carrying the U.S. Mail riding in a stagecoach or steam locomotive to other places to deliver the U.S. Mail to other men or women?

We have a man or woman carrying the U.S. Mail riding in a stagecoach or steam locomotive to other places to deliver the U.S. Mail to other men or women, why do we need the telegraph?

We have the telegraph, why do we need the telephone?

We have the telephone, why do we need faxing?

We have faxing, why do we need e-mailing?

We have e-mailing, why do we need e-mailing to lap-tops, blackberries, and other portable devices?

We have e-mailing to lap-tops, blackberries, and other portable devices, why do we need texting?

We have texting, why do we need I-Phones, myriad apps, Twitter, and Facebook?

We have I-Phones, myriad apps, Twitter, and Facebook, why do we need teleporting?

We have teleporting, why do we need teleporting to distant planets and other dimensions?

We have teleporting to distant planets and other dimensions, why do we need time traveling?

We have time traveling, why do we need gerwaffling?

We have gerwaffling, why do we need krelmaning?

We have krelmaning, why do we need Badidi Badidi Badidi Roy_ying?

We have Badidi Badidi Badidi Roy_ying, why do we need shoving each other?

The End.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

10 comments:

Alan W. Davidson said...

I've often wondered the same thing myself, especially the krelmaning...it's quite a viscious circle we've gotten ourselves into. Why can't we be happy with what we've got?

gail maria said...

I think we should have stopped at grunting. Everything can be said/expressed with a grunt. And maybe one really really big word.

Perry Block said...

Funny YOU should say that, Alan!

I was perfectly happy with krelmaning and was coaching the Junior Krelmaning Team at the High School. Meanwhile you were on Fox News almost nightly pushing Badidi Badidi Badidi Roy_ying with your good friends Sean Hannity and Bill O'Reilly.

The result: As a people, throughout all of planet Earth, here we are back to shoving each other again!

And the Junior Krelmaning Team had such a bad season, next year I'm back to coaching Girls Hopskotch.

Perry Block said...

OK, Gail, I can't wait to hear ...

What's that one really really big word?

kdmccrite2 said...

Oh Perry.

You kill me. I am now dead.

Perry Block said...

Oh, no, kd! Don't die!

I could never replace such a devoted fan!

What's that? I could get Mae?

Oh, good. RIP, kiddo!

lindacassidylewis.com said...

Great blog name!

Thanks for making me smile this morning.

Perry Block said...

Linda,

Thank you! Although I'd give it all up in a minute to be "Jeune Toujours, Cute as the Dickens."

I'm glad I made you smile. I'd look into that right upper bicuspid, if I were you.

Lexi said...

Never mind all that communicating, when am I going to get my flying car?

Perry Block said...

One 2059 Alfa Romeo Spider coming up!