If Leonardo da Vinci Had A Goofy Sidekick

 

                                    

(In the hallowed tradition of If Moses Had a Goofy Sidekick  and If Henry David Thoreau Had Added a Goofy Sidekick to Walden, I hereby humbly present this to you, the third installment in "The Goofy Sidekick Annals." 

Who knows?  Maybe next time I'll write "If You Had a Goofy Sidekick.") 

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"I've just completed this prototype drawing of a flying machine," said Leonardo da Vinci aloud, "and I think at long last mankind might take to the skies!

 

But there's the possibility if I were to build one of these it might crash and send anyone I could talk into climbing aboard to a fiery doom. But where can I find  someone so gullible, so naive, so downright stupid as to take such a foolhardy risk?"

"Hey, Leo, open up! It's your old buddy, Farky Noodleman!"

"Farky, Farky!  Y'know, I was just thinking about you."

"How's the Renaissance treating ya, Leo?"

"Fine, Farky.  Glad those Gothic Middle Ages are finally over!"

"Goths creep me out too!  And I'm sick and tired of being picked last whenever the guys suit up for jousting practice."

"Say, Farky, let's go into my studio, got some interesting work to show you."

"Holy crap, look at that!"

"That's the statue of David, on loan from my friend Michelangelo."

"Well, that certainly makes me feel inadequate, especially as a Jewish guy!" 

"Hey, Farky, here's something I just completed."

"Twelve guys eatin' out?  I hope they knew to ask for separate checks."

"It's The Last Supper."

"If they haven't gotten separate checks and left a decent tip, it will be the Last Supper! Hey, Leo, ever think about doin' a painting of 'Doges Playing Poker?'  Could be your masterpiece."

"Umm, maybe next time.  Right now I've got a young woman coming over whose portrait I'm going to paint.  Oh, here she is now."

"Hello, Mr. da Vinci."

"Hi, Clara. Meet my friend, Farky Noodleman. Farky, say hello to Clara Schwartz."

"Hello, Mr. Noodleman.  Pleased to meet you."

"Charmed I'm sure, Ms. Schwartz!  Say, did I ever meet ya on a J-Date?"

"I don't think so."

"Hey, Ms. Schwartz, if you don't mind a suggestion, you might wanna put on some makeup for the painting.  Maybe some lip gloss. Or a little blush."

"Thank you, Mr. Noodleman, but I prefer a natural look."

"Well, then just give us a big broad smile for the camera, Clara!  I mean, for the palette."

"No, Farky, I want The Clara Schwartz to be known forever for her enigmatic smile."

"Well, okay, but I'm not diggin' the name."

"What do you mean?"

"How about somethin' a bit cooler than Clara Schwartz? Like Mona ... yeah,  maybe like ... say ... Mona Lisa?"

"I like that very much, Mr. Noodleman."

"So do I, Farky. 'The Mona Lisa,' it is!"

"Glad I could be of service, youse two.  Now, Leo, let's talk those Doges Playing Poker!"

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Leonardo da Vinci's Doges Playing Poker.