"The-Discount-That-Must-Not-Be-Named" Twelve Years Later

 

I can tell she gets it.  

Only The-Discount-That-Must-Not-Be-Named for

her. 

It was over 12 years ago that I coined the term "The-Discount-That-Must Not-Be-Named."   

Why?

"Okay, sir," says the cashier behind the class booth at the Bryn Mawr Film Institute," that will be eleven dollars with the Senior Discount." 

“Thank you,” I reply.

To which she adds" ... you addle-pated, wrinkled, washed-out, past-tensed, decrepit, detestable travesty of a human being."

"Well, umm, I kind of resent the ‘washed out’ part of what you said,” I stammer. 

"Senior Discount ticket, sir? There’s seating up front," says the ticket taker inside the theater.

“Thank you,” I reply.

“To which he adds …” hopefully up front you’ll be able to hear at least some of the movie, you addle-pated, wrinkled, washed-out, past-tensed, decrepit, detestable travesty of a human being."

""Well, umm, I kind of resent the ‘detestable travesty of a human being’ part of what you said," I stammer.

Now let’s replay all of the above with The-Discount-That-Must-Not-Be-Named.  

Okay, sir," says the cashier behind the class booth at the Bryn Mawr Film Institute," that will be eleven dollars with The-Discount-That-Must-Not-Be-Named.”

“Thank you,” I say.

To which she adds “Please enjoy the show.”

"Discount-That-Must-Not-Be-Named ticket, sir? There’s seating up front," says the ticket taker inside the theater.

“Thank you,” I say.

To which he adds “Please enjoy the show.”

Now to be fair, Senior wasn’t always a four letter 6 letter word. It was once devised as the politically correct replacement for words like Elderly.

And as the later 20th Century stand-in for those words, it has performed admirably, especially for members of the Greatest Generation who received more of their greatly deserved due when regarded as respected seniors, not out-to-pasture elderly.

But now it’s more than time for Senior and its even more insidious buzzkill of a cousin Senior Citizen to also go the way of elderly and its kin. And I wouldn’t mind if sassy, feisty, and spry also join the ranks of those misbegotten objectionable adjectives as well.

With The-Discount-That-Must-Not-be-Named all pernicious mindsets about Boomers and Pre-Boomers are forever extinguished.  After all, we're not "seniors” at all; we're regular folk, like everyone else, who just happen to be a little older.

So why not join me and start using the The-Discount-That-Must-Not-be-Named yourself?

 One day when it truly catches on, it will change the world.

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