Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Gingerbread Island


Lot's Wife
Copyright: Dawn Q. Landau

Dr. Rosa Bonamie could not believe her amazing discovery --- an island in the middle of the Pacific made wholly of gingerbread, with a bit of whipped cream here and there as well!

"What a fascinating people must have once lived here!" she thought. "Did they have books, science, social media? If only I could have spoken with them."

With that she heard a guttural sound and behind a mass of whipped cream she spotted a man made of gingerbread!  He spoke:

"I am Lord Oakrum, last of the Gingerbread Men."

Dr. Bonamie rushed to his side, lifted him in the air, and swallowed him whole.

"Damn!  If only I could have controlled my love of gingerbread, I'd have learned so much instead of wiping out the entire race!"   


 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Of course, Dr. Bonamie could have limited herself to eating the buildings and the countryside if she wanted to spare the people of Gingerbread Island, but we can assume the people were probably a bit fresher and tastier than the rest of the place.  And from the picture prompt above it looks like Dr. Rosa was packing a pretty big appetite!

If you've got an appetite for some fresher and tastier flash fiction, click here and the other Friday Fictioneers will more than fill you up.

Hey, why don't we get together for some gingerbread this holiday season? Buildings and countryside only!

46 comments:

  1. LOL! This wins my vote as the best Friday Fictioneers entry!

    God, I love gingerbread. I can totally sympathize with Dr. Bonamie here.

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    1. Thank you, but if you sympathize with Dr. Bonamie, here's hoping you're in the confectionary business and not the anthropology one. Critical research ruined! But delicious.

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  2. Hahahahhahahhahahahahahahahaha
    i got a good belly laugh with this one.
    Snap......
    as in gingersnap!

    Randy

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    1. I love all those laughs, Randy! Just be careful of that belly with all the ginger snaps. I want it to keep laughing for many years to come.

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  3. Only you could have come up with this, Perry. What a wondrous place your creative mind is!

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    1. The sewer is a wondrous place? Thanks, Dawn.

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  4. Omigoodness .... it DOES look like gingerbread .... !
    Now THIS really did make me laugh -- good one!

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    1. Frankly I couldn't see it as anything else, although the whipped cream swirls do leave something to be desired. Thank you!

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  5. Is there no limit to your imagination? Great take on the prompt.

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    1. There is no limit, but there is a quota. When the quota is reached, we'll have to smuggle my imagination in! Thanks, Sandra!

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  6. Love it! A Finnish colleague at work used to make gingerbread houses for Christmas.

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    1. Quick, tell her to cook up some live Gingerbread men for us to chow down on!

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  7. Dear Perry,

    Too bad Lord Oakrum didn't run, run as fast as he could. Your story is baked to perfection and proves you haven't lost your imagination.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

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    1. It wouldn't have mattered. He'd have been eaten by the fox anyway. And I actually baked the story for 8 minutes too long.

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  8. Dear Blogspot Man,

    I laughed at your punchline and cried when I realized I'd have to leave a comment on a Blogspot Blog. But here goes....Great job with Dr. Bonamie. I loved how she had absolutely zero control. Guffaws ensued.

    Aloha,

    Doug

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    1. Doug, I actually don't like Blogspot either and i know it somehow kills certain comments (hopefully mostly the negative ones). But it's where I started and I really like the look of the blog now, including the cartoon, and after all nobody much reads it anyway, so why switch? Dr. Bonamie thanks you for recognizing her lack of self control but she's too busy eating to write to you.

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  9. Perry, Hilarious! : ) I'd guess you were hungry when you wrote this. Could Dr. Bonamie be cast out of her profession for eating inhabitants of the areas she studies? It could be she's spent too much time studying cannibals. She may have trouble getting Thanksgiving invitations from now on. : ) ---Susan

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    1. I think her report back to the University will omit some details, like how long the Gingerbread tribe has been extinct. And yes some folks to whose homes she's been invited for Thanksgiving have turned up missing, so it is likely she may have to hit the island for a meal come the last week of November. And you're right, I am hungry!

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  10. Dr. Bon Ami really cleaned up, didn't she? :-) This was so enjoyable and now I'm too full for dinner. But zero calories!

    janet

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    1. Janet,
      No, lotsa calories. But you can afford it!

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  11. So many of us say, "If only," after it is too, too late. Very funny, Gingerbread Man.

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    1. Oh, who can make a sunrise, sprinkle it with .... oh, sorry, that's the Candyman. My bad.

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  12. A great stand against the evils of gingerbread men - a brave soul, you are sir1

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    1. It's a tough job, but somebody has to eat them!

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  13. Oh what fun this is. And We do gobble things up too much, without thought for the consequences. But I am getting very hungry now.

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    1. I got some gingerbread here for us, but remember --- only houses and countrysides!

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  14. Haha, my first laugh of the day on my day off work! Well done!

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  15. You and I were on the same wavelength this week, Perry. I saw S'mores and you saw gingerbread, so I guess we both had food on the brain. Did she eat the rear end too? I've had several women chew on mine, but so far none of them took a real bite. :)

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    1. Russell, I've heard the several women who chewed on yours only did so because everything else for miles around was eaten and even then they needed cocktail sauce. If you're looking for a real bite, try an alligator. Oh, and have a bit of Lord Oakrum on me!

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  16. Oh Crumb! Poor gingerbread man. Thanks for the giggles.

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    1. I feel sorry for him too, putting his trust in Dr. Bonamie and then he is no more. Now, if only we could find his children and eat them!

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  17. The doctor got her just desserts when she ate the gingerbread man! Thanks for a sweet story today.

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    1. Two puns in that small number of words absolutely deserves extra credit. I'll see if I can scare up some gingerbread for you.

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  18. So funny. That Rosa woman, keep clear.

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    1. Thanks, Patrick. But she's right behind you now!!!!

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  19. Oh dear, it's always wise to think before you eat. Easier said than done though, especially where gingerbread is concerned :)

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    1. Gingerbread is kind of addicting, but it would take a Rosa size appetite to wipe out a species. Hope she's at least full now!

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  20. Ah... and even worse.. gingerbread mildew of old gingerbread men is lethal..

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    1. Fortunately with Rosa we never had any old gingerbread men.

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  21. Whoopsie! Ha ha! I wanted to go there, Perry! Darn it! It was always my dream to go to Gingerbread Island, and now, I see it's been wiped out. Oh, nooooo! l'm going to treat myself to some whip cream now to feel better!

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    1. Well, the land and buildings and whipped cream are still there and who knows, you may run across a gingerbread chicken. Can't be bad.

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  22. Dear Perry, you and Russell think alike! Good story and funny as is Russell's. Very entertaining and too bad she ate before asking questions.

    Nan :)

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    1. Thanks, Nan! But which story made you hungrier?

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  23. Since i was born on December 21, my mom always made gingerbread boys. It's my favorite cookie --- more than chocolate chip. Point me to that island, Perry!

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  24. Extinction of a whole species was never so delicious. I can see why he was the last one. :) Sounds like a delicious place to be. Now I really want some gingerbread.

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