Thursday, June 19, 2014

The Man Who Showed Up

copyright Mary Shipman

"That's absolutely the worst contracting job I've ever seen, Mr. DiPhillipo!"

"Whaddya mean, Mr. Block?  I got everything done as you asked." 

"Look at that wallpaper! It's faded, it's shredded,  the design looks like fleas copulating!"

"You don't like abstract art I take it, Mr. Block?"

"The banister is just a hunk of old rotted wood!"

"It's early American."

"And what about these two gaping holes in the wall?!"

"Extra storage space.  Whaddya want, Mr. Block?  I'm a contractor and I showed up!"

"OMG, you're right!  How much do I owe you?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Not only is Mr. DiPhillipo the man who showed up,  but I also showed up this week for the Friday Fictioneers with a very concise and well-constructed 93 words in my weekly entry in response to the picture prompt above.

Click right here and the other Friday Fictioneers will show up as well, each with his or her own unique interpretation of the prompt.

Now I'd love it if you'd join me in enjoying my new basement!  Hope you like drafts,  leaky ceilings,  and abstract art.

29 comments:

Glynn said...

I thought the two gaping holes were windows.

P.S. Joshi said...

Perry, Hilarious story once again. Once again I laughed out loud. : ) You better take some lessons in carpentry. Doing it yourself would be much less expensive and a better job. Of course, the contractors' union might come after you. They've got a good thing there. Well done. : ) ---Susan

Carrie Rubin said...

Fun to see a funny story come out of that pic. I've read a few creepy entries now, but nothing else that mentions copulating fleas. That's tough to beat!

Jan Brown said...

Hilarious! I think I know that contractor....

Alicia said...

Perry, thanks for the laugh. I love the last line!!!

Perry Block said...

They are. These are les petites fenetres in the laundry room.

Perry Block said...

The problem is, Susan, if I tried to do it myself, I wouldn't show up! Thanks for the nice compliment.

Perry Block said...

Not that copulating fleas aren't a bit creepy as well.

Perry Block said...

You know him? You've actually seen him?!!

Perry Block said...

Thank you, Alicia. Yes, I worked on that last line for over 12 years. Finally I found a story to fit it in!

pattisjarrett said...

You'd better hurry and put that house on the market while real estate values are high!

cheryllynnroberts said...

That was quite entertaining :D

abodeofhorus said...

Description of the wall paper design is very imaginative ! :D
had my share of laughter - thanks Perry !

elappleby said...

I recently spent three days waiting in for a contractor, so I know how it feels. Thanks for the laughs :D

Russell said...

A couple of those fleas look pretty well hung . . . on the wall, I mean.

Perry Block said...

For someone to buy it they'd have to be high.

Perry Block said...

Glad you liked it! Would you come and help me bail after the next heavy rain?

Perry Block said...

Darn it! I meant to give you two shares!

Perry Block said...

That's not so bad. I'm still waiting for two or three!

Perry Block said...

Now I'm really worried about you, Russell!

annehiga said...

Too funny! You had me at "fleas copulating" and "early American." But sealed the deal at - hey at least he showed up to do the work. #D

Perry Block said...

Glad you liked. It training the fleas to copulate was the hardest part of the job!

Anonymous said...

Dear Perry, Good story and the "fleas" line was hilarious!. Excellent writing and I loved it! Good job Perry! Nan :)

lizy-expat-writer said...

I thought Mr block was a bit of a wimp! I'd have called Trading Standards,

Courtney Wright said...

Getting a contractor to show up CAN be a daunting task.... abstract art not withstanding! LOL! Great post! :-)

Perry Block said...

Mr. Block a wimp? Why .... why ... of course he is!

Perry Block said...

Thank you, Courtney. I'm still waiting a contractor who was scheduled to work on my house in 1997.

Perry Block said...

Thanks, Nan! Yes, flea jokes are one of my specialties.

amyreesewrites.com said...

I love the extra space. That's one way to create extra storage, Perry. I now have a new outlook on life. It reminds me of the holes my brother used to punch into the wall. I can laugh about it now. Thanks, Perry!