One, Two, Three!

"Why do you have a goat in your living room, Frank?"

"Well, you know how many archived files I have from over the years.  I didn't want to lug em' out to the curb and try to find somebody to take them."

"So?"

"I got me Old Tessie here.  She'll eat all the file boxes one, two, three! and then I'll sell her to the zoo."

"I see.  But, Frank, I think maybe ...."

"Maybe what?  It's a brilliant idea!  Get rid all the old stuff one, two, three!" 

"Sure.  But, Frank...."

"But Frank, what?! "

"But, Frank, not only is your carpet full of one and two!, but  I think old Tessie three! is anorexic!"

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Anybody want to buy a goat cheap?  She's on special this week. 

Old Tessie was the subject of my weekly submission to the Friday Fictioneers but now fortunately she's enrolled in an Eating Disorders Clinic and doing quite well, except she can't keep down tin cans as yet.   Click here to see what the other Fictioneers  wrote about Old Tessie, although I doubt they named her Old Tessie or even bothered to clean up after her.

One, two, three!, I'm gone!

The Goat Tester

Ever since he had seen the movie Carrie in 1976, Hector had been terrified to go near a grave.  It didn't matter whether it be the grave of someone long deceased or one recently departed, a person from history or his late Aunt Edna, Hector would always shake with fear.

So when he learned the promised job in the new town was that of headstone polisher, Hector began to quake with terror. "Not to worry," said his new employer, "we will get you a Goat Tester."

"Baa, Baa, Baa" said the Goat Tester on Hector's first day at work.  "Baa, Baa, Baa, Baa,  BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Hector scribbled a frenzied note to ask for a new Goat Tester in the morning.

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There's nothing like a good Goat Tester, as my submission for this week's Friday Fictioneers based upon the picture prompt above quite clearly proves. You may want to get yourself a quality Goat Tester as well for your next headstone polishing gig, that is, provided Hector's employer has any to spare.

When you're ready to approach the entries of the other Fictioneers, all of whom are very much alive and totally above ground, you may stealthily creep up to them, hold your breath,  and click here.

Have a pleasant week, don't rent Carrie, and I'll see you soon.