Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Where There's Smoke (FF)


 © Roger Bultot

"It was an unintended consequence of the legalization of marijuana,"said Governor Hickenlooper of Colorado, “but house fires are up over 50% in the state, and most of them go unreported because when a fire breaks out, no one seems to care."

"What can be done, Governor?" asked Reporter Doyle of the Chronicle.
"I’m proud to announce we've developed a new fire alarm system to fully address the problem.  As soon as the system detects smoke, it issues a special chemical into the environment."

"What does the chemical do?"

"In induces the feeling that philosophical questions about life are boring, you've a European Civilization final tomorrow, and who the hell wants to eat Oreos anyway!"

~~~~~~~~~

Ironically I read that Governor Hickenlooper has come out against legalization of marijuana stating that he wished it had never passed. I'm not sure about that, but I do wish to come out against the name Governor Hickenlooper, because it makes me giggle.

To see what the other Friday Fictioneers feel about Governor Hickenlooper, the picture prompt above, Oreo Cookies, and more, please click here.

Damn, I forgot about that final!

35 comments:

Russell said...

Now, Perry, it's obvious from the photo that the fire in the upstairs bedroom was caused by unprotected hot sex (not that either one of us have any experience with that).
I do believe you misspelled the Governor's last name. It should read Smokenhooter. From what I hear, the guy never inhales. Pass me an Oreo, will ya?

thewritersvillage said...

Oh wow. I wish i could have finished reading your story. Started off a little smoky and then I thought smoky? So I did another doobie. When I got back to your story, I couldn't pronounce that Gov's name. I sat there for 20 minutes, laughing, man, trying to sound it out. Truly insane. Hey, how about a YouTube instead. I'm really not into, you know, reading and I got that test tomorrow in Eur Civ and some damn noise is going off from some damn detector in the damn ceiling. Where's that other joint?.

greenwalledtower said...

I think there would be a lot of teachers and parents who'd want to get their hands on some of that straighten-up-and-fly-right juice. :)

Sandra Crook said...

I hope they've patented that antidote. :) Keep 'em comin' Perry.

abodeofhorus said...

Russel has a point about the cause of the fire ! Am in for those Oreos too...

Björn Rudberg said...

Oops I wonder if the that will weed out the unintended fire..

Douglas MacIlroy said...

Dear Perry,

Is that really his name? I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that your made up statistics (were they?) are going to come true. Lovely story.

Aloha,

Doug

Rochelle Wisoff-Fields said...

Dear Perry,

Wow, what a rush. Good shit.

Shalom,

Rochelle

plaridel said...

just wondering what the governor was smoking... :)

Dawn said...

"most of them go unreported because when a fire breaks out, no one seems to care."
That cracked me up!

Runner with a Blog said...

loved thatI And I like (to much!) Oreos, whether or not I have "inducement"

Perry Block said...

You're right, Russell. I know so little about hot sex I think the name "Smokenhooter" is dirty. And don't Bogart those Oreos, my friend, pass them over to me.

Perry Block said...

Randy, I hate to be the one to point this out, but your house burned down half an hour ago.

Perry Block said...

I be pleased to donate my share, no charge at all.

Perry Block said...

Thanks, Sandra. I plan to get around to it in the next six months or so.

Perry Block said...

Yes, he has a point, but not with that many of this crew. And it's your turn to buy the next Family Size box of Oreos!

Perry Block said...

Cute, Bjorn.

Perry Block said...

Yes, I made up the statistics but I didn't make up Hickenboober. I mean, loober. No, its goober. Wait, it's ... The odd thing is I'm not even stoned!

Perry Block said...

What do you say we finish this joint and get out of here? This inferno like heat is starting to bum me out.

Perry Block said...

I'm wondering what his ancestors were smoking when the family name was derived.

Perry Block said...

Yes, but you stoned Friday Fictioneers will laugh at anything.

Perry Block said...

Sorry, we're out of Oreos and into Reese's Pieces now.

amyreesewrites.com said...

But I need Oreos, Perry. Life wouldn't be the same without them. So funny and clever. I needed this today. :)

mikefalkner1 said...

"Dude ... What's happennnnning" Are you just making up the story about the final tomorrow? I'm hungry. Got anything to eat?

P.S. Joshi said...

I think I just gained 5 pounds reading about all those Oreos, Perry. It's a good thing they legalized smoking weed there as those firemen are getting high just working on putting out the blaze. Has the governor paid a visit yet? :D

Perry Block said...

All right, but you're not getting my double stuff!

Perry Block said...

Have I got something to eat? Have I got something to eat? Hmm ... sorry, ate it all!

Perry Block said...

The Governor hasn't been able to get himself out of his mansion lately, but that's okay; he can issue his condemnations of marijuana directly from there.

lizy-expat-writer said...

You'd think by now those immigrants to America with names that are laughable in English - even the US version of English - would have changed their names by deep-poll.

Perry Block said...

Well, I changed my name to make it more palatable. My name was "Kirk Rogers," but I thought I'd be cooler as Perry Block. That ensured that people would call me Blockhead all through my life, which was exactly what I wanted!

nanclairefalkner said...

Perry, I want some Oreos too! Do you know they come with colored icing now - Pretty colors - WOW~ Good story and good dessert! Nan

Subroto said...

Maybe the Governor should run for the White Castle..er the White House as it is now presently called. And probably write a book, 'The Audacity of Dope'.

Dale said...

Oye! I don't know what's funnier... the story or all the comments! Fun stuff!

Perry Block said...

You should be his Chief of Staff. Great suggestions!

Perry Block said...

Thanks, Dale! Glad you found them "delectable."