Wednesday, December 10, 2014

Environmentally Correct (FF)

copyright Sandra Crook

"What kind of people are these?" exclaimed Michele.  "To leave a beautiful site like this so disgusting and filthy!"

Michele and Billy were taking a walk on Sunday across Sutter's Bridge when they came upon the shameful scene.

"Who knows?" agreed Billy. "I can't imagine how anybody could be so malicious to heave anything and everything off the bridge like this!"

"Let's clean it up!" proclaimed Michele. 

Michele and Billy scrambled off the bridge and down to the site, eager to get started. "Here, Michele," said Billy, "hand me that rock and plot of grass and I'll start siphoning up all the water."

"Great, Billy!  In no time at all we'll have the rubbish, shit, and garbage looking as perfect and pristine as new!"

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You've probably encountered sites like this too --- all those babbling brooks and waterfalls covering up beautiful car tires, beer cans, and dead bodies!  Well, I'm proud to say that my Friday Fictioneers story this week strikes a powerful call for the environment!

Please hug an abandoned tire today.

You may also want to hug one or all of the other Fictioneers (literally or figuratively) by clicking here. And then please help me and Billy siphon up all this disgusting water. Here's your straw.

37 comments:

  1. Al Gore just had a heart attack from you.

    Randy

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    1. Got one from the Supreme Court earlier. Thanks for writing, Randy!

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  2. Very clever. :) (sorry if this appears twice, posted then had to sign into Google for some reason).

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    1. It doesn't appear twice, Sandra, don't worry. The more common problem for me is that comments don't even appear once!

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  3. Dear Perry,

    I think Michele and Billy miss the point of cleanup. Just saying.

    shalom,

    Rochelle

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    1. In their world, they've got it nailed. Who's to say random beer cans aren't more beautiful than waterfalls where they live?

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  4. Dear Randy,

    I am unable to leave a comment on your post that addresses your story. Blogspot keeps locking me out. I'm using the Elgoog mirror site to get this through to you. Please clean up the trash and switch to WP soonest.

    Aloha,

    Doug

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    1. I'll pass that on to Randy right away. I hate Blogger, but here my site be ensconced. Maybe one day I'll decide to join the switch but for now indolence prevails.

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  5. That was one Rad Environmentalist Couple !

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    1. I dunno. At least they live their convictions, which is more than most people can say.

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  6. Oh, what a great twist at the end. Really caught me off guard.

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    1. Good, Alicia. But I'm not going to catch you off guard, so I hope you land on something soft.

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  7. I knew that there are reasons for dumps.. it's just different views on beauty.. it has to be.

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    1. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. But these two really need glasses!

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  8. Wow, these two are geniuses! Very funny take on the prompt :-)

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    1. Well, I only hang out with geniuses. My next story will feature Albert Einstein dishing on Kim Kardashian.

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  9. You must be the same guy who decorated Detroit.

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    1. Not me, it's Michele and Billy. I understand they do a lot of landscaping business in the Ozarks. I'll send them over, I think I get a commission.

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  10. I can see this. These are those people, you know the ones that like "modern" art. Sculptures made out of just such debris. Yep, I've seen their "work".

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    1. You've seen it, yes. But if you want to buy a geniune Billy and Michele, you're going to have to pay plenty!

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  11. A cynical and humorous take - enjoyable :) .
    KT

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    1. What's cynical? Damn, there's another flower cluttering up our environment!

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  12. Hug a spare tire--yep, all those holiday treats are packing on the pounds. So nice of you to notice. Thanks for doing your part to clean up the environment.

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    1. I'm sure that you have no spare tire and no need to fear my hugging you! And thanks, the environment is indeed safe in my hands.

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  13. Each to their own, I suppose - Billy and Michelle are not my kind of people!

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    1. They always speak well of you. In fact they're coming over with a matched set of empty coke cans right now!

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  14. Perry, Well, at least they care, I guess. Hilarious ending. :) --- Susan Joshi

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    1. They do care! They never met a hunk of rusted metal they didn't love. Who of us can say as much?

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  15. Admittedly, for one brief second I thought you'd gone serious on us, Perry. Your twists are always some of my favorite! Very clever for a nouveau old guy.

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    1. Thanks, Dawn. Only problem is that I'm really an established old guy now. But I'm not changing my name or my picture!

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  16. Dear Perry, Great story! I don't think that the pigs would want to visit this site. Cute! Nan :)

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    1. Thanks, Nan. What do you mean? All my relatives want to visit that site!

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  17. Great twist. Has more power than a lecture.

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    1. I'm still going to lecture you though. Here's "The Pure Joy of Macroeconomics," Part 1 of 5.

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  18. If you're going to have a dump, at least make it a sparkling one. I get that. I like their style. Good story.

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    1. Thanks! Yep, that rubbish is gonna shine.

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