Flanked by White House staff and leading Republican senators and congressmen, President Trump today signed into effect his latest Executive Order, which provides a 90 day ban for entrance into America for all Americans. The President stated he is taking this action in order to protect every American from Americans.
"Last year, Americans killed over 15,956 Americans," commented Mr.Trump. "Do you think I'm going to allow some American to come into America and kill Americans? Not on my watch!"
Pursuant to the order, over 17 million Americans have already been stopped at American airports and deported back to their home country. Since that makes no sense, they are being deported to Little America in Antarctica.
"Everything is going very smoothly," said Mr. Trump,"as I know more about implementing a ban on Americans than any other American ever living in America. In fact, I may extend the ban indefinitely as long as the deadly risk to Americans by Americans continues."
"Or at least until the risk to me of being criticized by Americans stops."