A Comedy Sketch for Modern Times. Whether or not it's funny is wholly another matter.
Cast
Matt – middle-aged man reading a book on a
train
Bobby – younger man, early 30s, a passenger on the train
Amber – a bit younger woman, mid 20s, also on the train
Scene – an Amtrak train, headed maybe to Philadelphia
The Time - slightly in the future
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
BOBBY
Excuse me. Excuse me, sir.
MATT
Yes?
BOBBY
I don't mean to be pushy or anything like that but don't you have a phone?
MATT
Yes, of course I do.
BOBBY
But you're not reading anything on your phone.
MATT
Oh, I'm reading a book. It's The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald.
BOBBY
I remember. I read that in high school
MATT
The Great Gatsby?
No, a book.
Here, would you like to hold it?
I don't know. Is it safe? Do we need to put in a Password?
Does the Password need to be case sensitive?
MATT
No, no password necessary. you just take one hand like this and the other one like this. BTW, my name is Matt, nice to meet you.
I'm Bobby, likewise. Umm, I can’t quite figure out…
Matt tries to place Bobby’s hands on the book, but Bobby twists the book to the side and gets it upside down. Matt flips it around.
MATT
Hold it like this. Good. Now you flip it around like this.
BOBBY
Wow! Words. Sentences.
MATT
Now just read them.
BOBBY
This is something! But why is there no click bait in the
margins? Like all Steven Seagal movies rated from Awful to God-Awful.
MATT
No clickbait in a book. Now read to the bottom of the
page and then go to the next one.
Okay, but what the … I can’t scroll down.
Bobby tries to scroll down with his
hand, swiping down. Meanwhile
MATT
No, you don’t scroll down. You just flip the page. Like this.
AMBER
Excuse me, guys. Don’t
either of you have phones?
BOBBY
Of course we do, but we're reading a book here. The Great
Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald.
AMBER
May I take a look. Hi, I'm Amber.
Bobby tries to turn the page but awkwardly grabs a clump of pages instead of one while Amber eagerly observes what he's doing. Bobby finally turns his clump of pages and smooths it all down.
MATT
Sure you can, Amber. Bobby, since you've kind of jumped to the end of the book, why don't you read the last sentence.
BOBBY (reading)
“So, we beat on, boats against the current, borne back
ceaselessly into the past.”
MATT
What do you suppose that means?
BOBBY
Well, umm, I think it means if we're sailing in a boat to go forward we may need to fight the current backward.
MATT That's exactly it. Very good, Bobby!
AMBER
Gee, F. Scott Fitzy is
really shredding it, isn’t he?
MATT
He is! (amused by
Amber's word choice) Well, this is my stop.
BOBBY
Here’s
your book. (hands it to Matt)
MATT
No, tell you what; You take it. I’ve read it many times and I have another copy at home.
BOBBY
Hey, thank
you!
MATT
I’d be happy to know you read it. Goodbye, Bobby. Amber.
AMBER
So cool! He left it with you. But now what do we do with it?
BOBBY
I’m not sure. Maybe there’s a You-Tube video.
AMBER
Great. Let’s Google
it. But what do we Google? The Great ....?
BOBBY
No. I think maybe we
Google ....“Reading a Book.”
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